Boy Flounder
by katergator
Summary: Kater and Kry collab. A series of RobxStar drabbles.
1. Wonder

Kater and Kry are BACK, BABY!

And we are here to solve your problems. Your main problem being that there just aren't enough RobxStar drabbles. There's plenty of the Titans, and a lot of BBxRae, but where's the RobxStar love? Well it's right here, ladies and gentlemen. Kater and Kry are at your service.

A little explanation as to how this came about: Kryalla wrote a scene in _Touch_ where Robin and Starfire are forced together and are stuck under a mountain. We landed on the idea that it would be hilarious to write a bunch of crack drabbles where Robin and Starfire are stuck together under ridiculous circumstances. For inspiration we used a word generator and began writing drabbles based on whatever the word generator came up with. Soon we started writing any sort of drabble that had to do with RobxStar, all with one word titles. There will actually be an assortment posted, but some of them are still within the theme of Starfire and Robin being stuck together in ridiculous ways.

You're all going to groan, but since Kater is posting this time you won't get updates as fast as Kryalla can whip them out (Kry: tee hee, you said 'whip it out'). Kater promises to do her absolute best to post as often as possible however, pending her stupid crazy life.

Also, we're open to one-word suggestions. If you all think of a word that could make an interesting situation, we'll do our best to pick out ones that inspire us to write a drabble. You guys can be our word generator!

Please also note that while Kater tries to filter Kry's goofy Aussie spelling, sometimes things slip through so don't be hatin' on Kry for adding erroneous letters into her words. (I'm so mean, giggle. You know I love you Kry)

Disclaimer: We don't own the Titans or anything DC related. But seriously, wouldn't you all love it if we did? Cause we'd do stuff like this. You'd eat it up, you so know it.

And thus concludes the author's note that is nearly as long as the chapter.

* * *

**Wonder.**

It was not often that the Boy Wonder's equipment malfunctions, although with Beast Boy in the Tower it was happening with more frequency. Starfire and Robin froze in horror and waited anxiously for the grappling hook to finish winding around them. It's not that it wasn't nice to be pressed against Starfire, he just didn't think she appreciated his face trapped to her chest.

"Gee," he said as Beast Boy laughed hysterically. "I wonder how that happened."

* * *

**Shake.**

"Sorry sir, but we only have one vacancy available. There's a convention in town," the old man behind the counter said. "All the farmers like seeing the new harvesting equipment."

Robin grimaced. He glanced behind him at Starfire.

"Uh… okay. We'll take it then."

The man grinned at him as he took the keys off the peg. "Lucky you, it's our honeymoon suite."

Robin's hand stopped in midair to retrieve the key. "It's _what_?"

The old man just winked at him. "You and your lady have a nice stay now."

Starfire gave him a friendly wave and Robin dreaded what a honeymoon suite boasted in the only two-bit motel in this tiny little farming community.

The T-Car had broken down on their way back from a charity event in a neighboring city. It was nighttime now, too dark to work on the car and no repair places were even close or open at this hour anyway. Robin cursed the T-Car's attitude. It never broke down for Cyborg. He would swear the thing was actually sentient.

Even if he and Starfire were dating, the last thing he wanted to do was spend the night in a honeymoon suite. That was just asking for trouble.

He unlocked the door and wondered if there might be two beds, although he should have expected it.

"Oh, it is shaped like a heart!" Starfire squealed, clapping her hands. "How adorable!"

Robin's face flushed all the way down his neck and he pulled at his collar.

"Look at this," she said curiously, touching a little metal box next to the bed. "What does this do?"

"Starfire, don't!" Robin blurted, but it was too late.

Starfire shrieked and backed away from the bed. "It is shaking!"

Robin slapped his hand over his face.

"Robin, please, why is the bed shaking?"

"Um..."

"Robin!" Starfire exclaimed, pointing upward.

"There is a mirror on the ceiling! Why is there a mirror there? Do humans like to watch themselves sleep?"

Robin groaned. She had to go and notice the mirror. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

**Flounder.**

There are not too many things that can make Robin tongue-tied.

He was trained by Batman, after all. A jack of all trades so to speak. Long tedious lessons in diplomacy, diction, books on languages and grammar studies. Robin had a lot of knowledge about a lot of different things. Quantum physics, computer programming, mechanics, politics, engineering, history -both modern and ancient. He was an expert at hand to hand combat, a weapons expert, a licensed pilot, an incredible acrobat. He could problem solve, look for pattern in criminal activity. His ability to adapt in battle was second only to Batman. He could solve the Rubik's cube in under a minute. He knew Morse Code, was an expert at Cryptology.

When he and Batman used to be _partners_ (not a sidekick), there was often no need to speak. They knew each other's strengths and protected their weaknesses. They knew their jobs, what was expected of each other. Batman would be taking down the enemies, Robin would be hacking the computers to take out the defenses.

In a way, he was freer then. He knew his mission. It was all about the crime fighting. All about protecting the innocent.

Now… as part of the Titans, not so much.

Robin was an expert at so many different things. Except for friendship.

Now there were things happening around him he had no control over. Beast Boy's pranks, Raven's explosive emotions, Cyborg's push for leadership. The loud gaming sessions. Movie night. Food and cooking. Who did the dishes. Shopping. Budgets. Cultural differences. Starfire.

He liked being part of a team, really he did.

Except for days like today. See, Starfire had embraced the human celebration of Halloween more than Robin would have liked. She'd spent the day decorating in the common room with fake cob webs, cut pumpkins, little sparkly bats, and witches cauldrons, all the assortment of things that Robin supposed would be outside any normal house in Jump City.

But then, she'd insisted that each of them dress up.

Robin hadn't really wanted to, but since it was Starfire's first Halloween and he really did want to make her feel welcome, he consented.

Bad idea.

Bad, bad idea.

He never suspected what she'd dress up in. Never suspected that she could look _that_ good.

Black shiny leather. Incredibly tall heeled, the boots themselves reaching up to her thigh. Leather that hugged her rear so tight he could tell she wasn't wearing anything beneath. Black laced up corset, which hugged her like a second skin, creating curves that gave his mind very wicked non platonic thoughts. Her orange arms were exposed, skin at her shoulders all the way to her breasts. Her red hair tumbled down her back, captured underneath a black leather mask. Cute little cat ears peaking out the top.

She smiled at him when he entered the common room, stroking a black whip.

Robin was instantly drooling.

She floated over to him, like the cat that found the proverbial milk. "You like?" she purred.

Words failed him. "Flurbalabrlerg."

Starfire blinked. "Pardon?"

"Rastlebalberdurk."

Starfire grew concerned. "Are you ill?"

"Hasntfelbanook," he insisted.

"Cyborg? Have I broken Robin?"

"Lodotook!" Robin floundered.

"Nah, little lady," Cyborg said, grinning from ear to ear. "He says you look awesome."

Starfire beamed and hugged Robin tightly, squeezing the little remaining life from him.

Cyborg winked at Robin. "I'm fluent in boy flounder."


	2. Dancing

**Dancing.**

It was really dumb how it happened.

Starfire was dancing and singing as loud as she could to the radio while it was her turn to clean the kitchen. She wiggled her hips as she dried the dishes from the washer, telling the world if they like it they should put a ring on it. She just wanted to shake shake, shake shake as she wiped down the counters. She was tangoing with the broom while she swept, making it known that California Gurls were so hot they'd melt your popsicle when Robin decided he wanted a snack.

Starfire was dancing in front of him, facing away. She had no idea he was there. With a smirk, he crossed his arms and watched her having fun before his stomach growled and reminded him why he had ventured to the kitchen in the first place.

He went to pass Starfire, but she was still ignorant to his presence and stuck the broom out right in front of him as he was stepping forward. Normally he wouldn't have tripped over a broom handle, but Starfire had more strength than an average human. The handle didn't budge to his motion and down he went.

He instinctually flailed his hands out to catch his fall, grabbing a hold on Starfire's arm.

She shrieked in surprise and toppled over with him. His breath escaped in a puff as she landed on him, her ample chest right near his face.

"Oh! Robin! I did not know you were here!" she exclaimed.

"Yeah, uh…"

"Oh, I am most sorry," she blushed, realizing the suggestive position they were in. She sat up and that made it worse. She scrambled off and he propped himself up on an elbow, the other hand rubbing at his red face.

"I was doing the dancing," she said, embarrassed.

"I saw that."

"I did not mean to make you do the tripping."

"It's okay." He stood and offered a hand to help her up. "I just didn't realize I actually might break my neck trying to get a sneak peek."

Starfire giggled.

* * *

**Bike.**

Robin had to admit Starfire was getting better. She wore all the safety leathers he asked her to without complaint, even the helmet. She took the corners with ease. She indicated, stayed in the rear view mirror of the car in front of her. She accelerated and decelerated with skill and without causing the bike to wobble. She could activate the bike's defensive mechanisms without losing control. All in all, she was brilliant at driving the R-Cycle.

There was just one problem.

See, it was her hips. Not so much the hips themselves, but the way she shifted them when she rode. A little to the left before she'd bend her knee to turn. A little to the right to turn the other way. Wriggle back into the middle as she straightened out of the turn.

Not a problem, right?

Unless you happen to be the Boy Wonder, holding tightly to the warm feminine body in front of you. It was definitely a problem that whenever those sexy hips of hers moved, they brushed up against the wrong part.

Starfire couldn't quite understand why Robin stayed on the bike when they finished their lessons, all wrapped up in his cape. Nor did she really have the heart to tell him she knew what poked her back during the rides; why else would she ask for daily lessons?

* * *

**Perfect.**

The Titans were slinging through Jump, hot on the chase after Mumbo. The magician was tumbling through town, cackling and casting magic spells every which way.

Robin fired his grappling hook onto scaffolding and swung in a huge arc down the street.

"Do not worry Robin, we shall catch the Mumbo!" Starfire called as she flew past him.

He looked up just in time as Starfire took the lead to see up her skirt.

He couldn't help it. His eyes widened. Her panties were the same purple hue as her clothing but the cut challenged her curves, her round smooth flesh just peeking out the bottom. She had the perfect shape, it was so tempting to just want to-

Robin face planted into the side of a building.


	3. Pill

**Pill.**

"They are… happy pills, yes?" Starfire questioned hesitantly.

"No," Robin said shortly.

"Vitamins?"

"No."

"Are they for the headache?"

"No."

Starfire was insistent. "The birth control?"

Robin went red. "No. Really Star, do you have to know?"

"Robin, I am curious about these so called miracle pills! I continually get emails about them and how they increase stamina and sensation. Surely that is a good thing?"

Robin coughed. "Not these kind." He rubbed a hand over his face. "How do I put this? You don't have to worry about those. They're for the guy."

"Oh," Starfire said thoughtfully. "Perhaps you would benefit from them then?"

"No!"

* * *

**Clog.**

Robin wiped the sweat off his brow as he fiddled with the pipes under the sink. This was the third time it had clogged in a week. He would've made Cyborg fix it but the space under the cabinet was too small for the large robotic boy to fit. The Boy Wonder barely fit under there himself, lying on his back. He had removed the section of pipe that was old and rusty and was fitting it with a new piece.

"How goes the repairing of the pipes?" he heard.

"Uh, fine," he grunted, trying to hold up the new piece of pipe and clamp it at the same time.

"Do you need my assistance?"

"Actually if you can wiggle under here I could use a hand."

He saw Starfire's green eyes appear through the cabinet door as she leaned down. She crawled over his prone body and had to lie on top of him because there was nowhere else for her to fit.

"Uh," Robin said, forgetting what he was going to say because Starfire's breath was fluttering against his cheek and she was kneeling over him.

"Just um…hold this pipe up while I clamp it," he said hurriedly.

"Okay," Starfire said, blushing at their close proximity.

Robin glued the end of the pipe and slid it into place. While Starfire held its position he placed clamps on the ends.

"Now what?" she asked.

"Now we wait for a moment so the glue can dry, and then we turn on the water and see if it works."

After a moment he showed Starfire the nozzle to turn the water back on.

She reached over him and Robin couldn't move his head as her chest brushed against his chin.

They waited expectantly. All of a sudden there was an alarming hiss and cold water began spraying everywhere.

Starfire squealed and pressed against Robin, shielding herself against his chest.

"Damn it Jim, I'm a superhero, not a plumber," Robin sighed.

"Who is Jim?" Starfire asked, her wet hair plastering to her face.

* * *

**Lake.**

"Aren't you cold?"

"Not really," Robin said from where he tread in the water, already turning blue.

"But it is the middle of winter," Starfire said, floating above him. "I can see ice on the water over there, are you sure you are not cold?"

"This really wasn't my idea," he complained as he set off toward the bank.

"Yes, I do not believe you truly intended to come flying out of Ding Dong Daddy's boat at such speed. Cyborg and Beast Boy will continue after him. Do you wish for the lift?"

"Ahh, yeah. And a fire. A big one."

Starfire reached out a hand and plucked him out of the frigid water, darting above the surface toward the bank. Robin was shivering by the time she placed him gently against the pebbles on the shoreline.

"G-g-get f-f-fire g-g-"

Starfire dumped a large pile of kindling in front of him before he even got the instructions out and moments later a large fire was roaring, the spark supplied by starbolts. Before Robin could even think to protest she had his gloves, boots, belt, cape, and shirt off and was reaching for his pants.

"W-w-wh-wha?" he started to ask, grabbing his pants to keep her from removing them.

"Survival in the wilderness," she said, wrestling with his hands. "You are freezing. If you are not in wet clothing you will warm up faster. I will help you."

"B-b-but—"

"Please," she said and yanked at the pants again. "I do not wish for you to become sick. My body warmth will assist you."

He was shaking so hard he really couldn't object anymore. Especially not when Starfire was so incredibly warm after she wrapped her arms around him. She curled him against her chest, positioning him between her legs so she could get the most skin contact with him.

"Oh," Starfire said, when the shivering had begun to subside. "I see it is true."

"What?" he asked, cuddled against her chest, feeling warmer by the second.

"Cold water truly does shrivel the assets."

* * *

**Peer. - Suggested** **by Picimadar**

Robin held his towel around his neck as he decided to hit the locker room after an invigorating training session.

Starfire had headed to the girls' locker room just moments before. He grinned as he thought about all the moves he had taught her today. She was a really good learner and picked things up fast. He also couldn't resist the blush that rose to her cheeks every time he touched her. They were on the verge of something, but he just didn't know how to take that next step.

As he went past the girls' locker room he noticed there was a dark dent in the wall. He furrowed his brows and leaned closer. It was a hole. He pulled back again and noticed there seemed to be claw marks around it.

He rolled his eyes. Beast Boy. Probably trying to peek at Raven.

Wait a minute. Both Raven _and_ Starfire used the locker room. Robin's cheeks burned angrily at the thought that Beast Boy was peeping on Starfire. Just how much could he see through this thing anyway?

He peered through the hole.

Oh damn.

Starfire was just in view, her back facing him. She shook out her hair, wet from the shower and untied the white fluffy towel from her front. She draped it lower around her waist, drying herself off.

He gulped. Oh this was bad… he should look away. Right now. He should just walk away and not look anymore. At all. No looking. None. Oh…

She was pulling the towel away from her body. Robin flew back from the hole with bright red cheeks, his heart pounding.

"You know, I've always known Beast Boy would stoop to peeking in the girls' locker room, but I never figured you would."

Oh shit. Robin flung himself around and saw Raven standing there with her arms crossed and one eyebrow raised.

"Ah…" he said dumbly.

"He made that stupid hole so he could spy on us."

Robin narrowed his eyes. "And if you knew it was there why did you leave it?"

It was Raven's turn to blush.

* * *

**Popsicle – suggested by Fellinlovetoday**

_Kry: Umm… Kater, what's a popsicle? Is that what I think it is?_

_Kater: Silly Aussie. It's a frozen drink on a stick. _

_Kry: Ahh… okay. Closest thing we have here is called a __Paddle Pop__ or an Icy Pole._

_Kater: Snort. An Icy pole? Seriously, you guys have the weirdest names for things. Popsicle makes some amount of sense, like it's derived from icicle. I'm not even going to touch paddle pop, I just see all sorts of kinky things with that one…_

Robin had his head buried in paperwork all day and he was sick of it. He hated this part of being a hero but someone had to do it. Cyborg had done his share, so had Raven. Beast Boy often liked to invent things that hadn't actually happened during a fight because he thought it was hilarious. Like one time Robin was in the middle of a scuffle with Sladebots and then a band of roving piranha chickens attacked him and stripped his uniform and titanium cape to shreds in seconds. Robin was not amused when he double-checked Beast Boy's work. The prankster just couldn't be trusted to do it accurately, and Starfire's reports would have to be done again because she would slip into Tamaranian and no one understood that.

Sitting back on his chair, he sighed in relief at having finished. Time to go find his friends, and maybe one red head in particular... There was no one in the common room when he arrived but he was pretty sure he heard voices from the stairwell heading up toward the roof.

"It is very hard," Starfire said, her voice echoing down the hallway.

"Don't bite it!" Beast Boy exclaimed.

"Then what do you do with it?" Starfire asked.

"You have to suck on it," Beast Boy told her. "Or lick."

Robin blinked, his mind running wild. Just what where they up to? Just what was Starfire sucking on?

"Like this?" Starfire asked, and there was a slurping sound. "Oh! It is tasty!"

"Now you see why I wanted to show you mine."

Robin's eyes widened, his heart pounding in his chest as the thoughts rattled around in his brain.

"Yes, thank you Beast Boy. This is most enjoyable."

"Can I have a lick of yours, Beast Boy?" Raven asked.

"You don't want his," Cyborg complained. "It's nasty. Try mine."

"May I suck on yours, Cyborg?" Starfire asked.

Robin couldn't handle it anymore; he bolted up the stairs.

"No one's sucking on anything!" he blurted, then froze in horror as the rest of the Titans all turned around, sucking on popsicles.

Beast Boy laughed at Robin, Raven rolled her eyes, while Cyborg got this mischievously sly grin and waggled his eyebrow. Starfire simply smiled at him happily and tilted her popsicle toward him. "Would you like to lick mine, Robin?"

* * *

Note: I'm a little bit of a Trekkie; I just couldn't resist! =)

Also, look at you guys all lucky and getting five of them today.

–Kater


	4. Lunch

**Lunch.**

It's not often that food ties to kill you, but when Starfire cooks it's almost a certainty.

Wiggling boneless limbs flailed wildly, suckers grabbing anything it could as the wustlepus tried to wriggle free of its pot. Even after Robin said he didn't think it was quite done, Starfire reassuring him that the wustlepus was best eaten raw, he still felt a might annoyed when one of those tentacles managed to pick up both him and Starfire, crush them together and wave them around the room.

The other Titans just watched and laughed.

* * *

**Top.**

Robin gulped.

Starfire had worn her new top.

It was a tiny little thing that tied in the middle. It was white.

He had a soda in his hand and when he turned around, he didn't realize she was at his elbow waiting to ask a question.

"Woooooo! Wet tee shirt contest!" Beast Boy exclaimed. "Raven, your turn!"

* * *

**Slang.**

Robin was sitting on the couch, reading the day's news and minding his own business.

Starfire sidled up to him with a pleased and self-satisfied beam on her face.

He raised his eyebrows and looked up at her. She was practically bursting with excitement.

"What's up?" he asked.

She clapped her hands and contained a squeal.

"I have learned the slang!"

"Oh?" he said hesitantly.

"Yes! Please do the tapping of this because I am the turned on!"

"_What?_" Robin choked out.

"I have the heat if you bring the meat!"

Starfire was delighted at her new-found knowledge.

"Why is your face red? Would riding my va-jay-jay help?" Starfire looked pleased as punch.

Robin's eyes couldn't get any wider and he could hear an uproar of laughter down the hall.

"CYBORG!"

* * *

**Digging. **

First days of summer.

Starfire thought it was the best part of the year. The ground was soft and perfect for digging, flowers began to bloom, bees buzzed through the air. She had a little flower garden at the base of the Tower, protected from the elements within a little glass house. Lots of flowers in pots and nestled in beds.

Beast Boy kept a vegetable garden down there as well, being vegetarian he did like to have his veggies as fresh as possible and clear of the "junk those companies spray". Often throughout the year Starfire and Beast Boy would find themselves working side by side in their little garden.

Beast Boy saw summer as an excuse to dig. He'd turn into a gopher and tunnel through their garden beds, churning up the soil. Starfire thought it was funny every time he would pop out of the soil to check his bearing, then tunnel back down, his cute little furry legs wriggling. Dirt would fly out of the holes he created and Starfire would laugh and protect her face with her hands.

Cyborg had built them a wooden potting table. It was old and the legs were uneven although Starfire thought that was more because Beast Boy sharpened his teeth on it than Cyborg's handiwork. Starfire pondered her little seed packets, setting them out in various patterns on the table as she tried to determine which flowers she wanted to grow this year. Behind her Beast Boy scurried around his vegetable patch, preparing the ground.

Making her selection, she walked over to her side of the bed and knelt in the dirt. She carefully read the instructions on the back of the packet.

"Hey Star, whatcha doing?" Robin asked.

Starfire looked over her shoulder, smiling at him. "Preparing to plant my flowers for this year. Perhaps you would like to help?"

Robin grimaced. "I'm not really much of a green thumb." Starfire giggled and Robin shook his head, chuckling. "You _know_ what I mean!"

Starfire patted the patch of empty soil beside her. "Come learn."

Robin sighed and sat down in the dirt beside her. "So, what are you planting?"

"Marigolds," Starfire replied. "I love their bright colors. Plus, they keep the insects away from Beast Boy's vegetables. " Starfire handed Robin a seed packet. "Just dig your 'non-green' thumb into the soil and place a seed in, then cover it up."

Robin stuck his thumb into the prepared soil, creating a little hole, then tore open the seed packet Starfire had give him. "Like this?" he asked, putting a couple of seeds into the dirt.

"Perfect," Starfire said, smiling at him and turning back to her planting. "Keep the holes the hand-span apart."

"Okay."

They worked in silence for a while.

"Hey, I was wondering," Robin said after a while. "Did you want to catch a movie or…. Yeouch!" He sprung from the ground, seeds flying everywhere as he swiveled. "Something bit me!"

Starfire shot straight off the ground, concerned. "What?"

Beast Boy popped his gopher head out of the whole underneath where Robin had sat, grinning madly, although the grin died when he spotted Robin holding his behind. He morphed back to normal. "Oh, shit."

"Beast Boy?" Robin cried. "What the hell!"

"Sorry dude! I thought you were Starfire!"

"You were going to bite _Starfire_ on the butt? Beast Boy! Get back here!"

* * *

Yay I finally updated again! Sorry everyone, but I'm coming off an unintentional eight day stretch at work which is why I've been absent. Thank you for being patient.

No requests this time because Kry and I haven't had time to think about any. She's been working diligently on _Masks _(would you prefer requests or updates on _Masks_? Because I know what I pick, haha) and in what little spare time I have I've been taking a look at _One Thing_. Yes, it's still alive, I swear! Don't worry though, we will be getting to requests that have been made next post.

Anyway, enjoy.


	5. Itch

**Itch. – Suggested by Vylette Satine**

Raven was watching tv when Beast Boy sidled up to her and flopped onto the couch, a huge wicked grin on his face.

Raven didn't even have to look at him to feel the smugness radiating off him in waves.

"What'd you do," she said flatly, knowing that stupid grin was his successful prank grin.

"Robin's going to be very itchy," he snorted into his hands.

Raven narrowed her eyes at that questionable statement. "Um…"

"I totally put itching powder in his bed." He giggled almost uncontrollably at his own cleverness.

"Good one," Raven said, rolling her eyes.

"Wanna know the best part?" Beast Boy said, like he was sharing a secret.

"What."

"I just saw Starfire scratching like crazy."

* * *

**Bacon.**

Cyborg whistled jovially. He loved cooking. The Cy-B-Q was a great addition to the Tower. Sunday morning breakfast was always an event. Bacon, tomatoes, mushrooms, sausages, and hash browns. Eggs, even Beast Boy's tofu eggs, all prepared and ready to cook.

Cyborg knew he looked a sight in his white chef's hat and apron, but he liked to look the part too.

Starfire always eagerly watched him cook. Lately she had been expressing interest in learning how to cook the Earthen way, especially with all her failures to impress a certain boy wonder with her Tamaranian cooking. They were still trying to remove exploded wustlepus suckers from the ceiling of the common room.

Cyborg made her look the part of course; a chef must have the right accessories. She did look adorable in that little chef's hat and frilly apron. He was sure the boy wonder appreciated the way the apron clung to Starfire's form.

"When do I put the bacon on?" Starfire asked, clutching her spatula tightly as she looked down at the strips waiting to go on the hot plate.

"Gotta warm up the plate before you toss in the bacon," Cyborg told her, concentrating on getting the plate to the right temperature. "We need it to sizzle."

Robin jerked to attention from that remark. A sly thought crossed Cyborg's mind.

"You have to lather on the oil," he said cheekily. "Make it all slippery."

"On the bacon? Or on the hot plate?"

"Makin' bacon slippery is always the way to go," Cyborg quipped.

Robin's expression melted as he stared at Cyborg, his jaw dropping open.

"Just lay it on the plate all careful like, you don't wanna be too rough."

"Like this?" Starfire asked, carefully placing the bacon against the hot plate.

"Perfect. Now we just have to wait for it to sizzle. You can play with it if you like, caress it with your spatula. Slide it against the plate."

Robin groaned in exasperation.

"Sausages next," Cyborg said, passing Starfire the plate containing the links, watching Robin's reaction rather than what Starfire was doing. "You need to slip those in with the bacon."

"Oh!" Starfire said, jumping. "It spits."

"Gotta be careful with those premature spits," Cyborg teased. "You don't want a sausage to pop too soon!"

"I did not know sausages could pop."

Robin went an interesting shade of blue.

"Oh yes, it's a common problem for the inexperienced," Cyborg told her. "If you cook 'em too fast, they'll go bang. You have to roll them, so they sizzle evenly."

"Like this?"

"Perfect," Cyborg said. "Now, you have to watch your sausage carefully, without the sausage makin' bacon becomes pretty hard."

"I suspect that would be hard," Starfire remarked, nodding sagely.

"Now you're gettin' it," Cyborg told her gleefully. "You'll be an expert on makin' bacon in no time."

"Okay, okay," Robin said, grabbing Starfire and dragging her away. "Enough."

"But Robin," Starfire complained. "I was making the bacon with Cyborg!"

Cyborg just laughed.

* * *

**Assistance.**

"Robin!"

The boy wonder was at the control panel, monitoring the scanner.

"Yeah Star?" He swiveled in his seat to look at her.

"I require your assistance!" she said gleefully.

"Kay. For what?"

"I saw on the internet these sparkling gems. They are most beautiful but I did not understand and I asked Cyborg how to use them but he told me to come ask you."

Robin furrowed his brows. "What did you see?"

He peered around Starfire and looked at the grinning teen that was peeking back at him around the door to Ops.

"Oh! It is called the 'vajazzling' and I-"

"CYBORG. S_eriously_ you SUCK."

* * *

**Slash.**

Chest heaving in breath, Robin chased after the hooligans that dared slash the tires of his beloved R-Cycle. Starfire went high, hoping to head them off.

The ruffians scrambled over a tall wire fence, darting down an alleyway. Robin leapt, catapulting off the top of a parked car and jumped for the fence. Starfire however mistook his leap, diving to snatch him and ended up with his boot.

Robin crashed face first into the fence.

* * *

**Heat. –Suggested by Vylette Satine**

It was insufferable.

It was almost as hot as the highest recorded temperature ever in the city and it was unbearable. The thermometer mocked them, refusing to budge below 100 degrees Fahrenheit. This was the first heat wave that had hit Jump since the Titans formed and the tower's air conditioner was doing its best to cool the massive structure. Cyborg had fans built into his body and he was playing a videogame, sweat still dripping down his temple. Beast Boy had defeated the heat momentarily and went for a swim in the ocean, turning into a dolphin and skipping through the waves.

Raven was holed up in her dark room, her curtains drawn tight to shut out all manner of light and she had commandeered the tower's limited supply of fans. She sat on her bed with all three appliances pointed at her, meditating and wiping the perspiration off her forehead.

Robin was slumped on the couch in a pair of basketball shorts and nothing else. His mask was sweaty around his eyes and he sincerely wished he could take it off. His hair was plastered against his head, not even his gel could overcome this humidity. He was extremely thankful that even criminals didn't want to move today.

The only Titan he didn't know the whereabouts of was Starfire.

His mind drifted as he thought of his alien teammate. Out of all of his new found friends/partners, he seemed to get along with her the best. He and Cyborg shared a love of technology and things with motors and wheels, but they clashed over the challenge for leadership.

Beast Boy's maturity level and penchant for pranks left Robin exhausted. He didn't mind the changeling; he enjoyed battling him at the gamestation, but long-term company and stimulating conversation were not Beast Boy's strengths.

Raven was a mystery. She ghosted around the tower and mostly kept to herself. She had a razor sharp wit that was generally directed at the latter green skinned boy. Robin enjoyed what little time he spent with her, but she refused to open up. He found a certain sort of kinship with her because he knew exactly how she felt about hiding herself, but their similarities seemed to keep them from getting to know each other better. He respected her too much to pry, and he certainly didn't want her prying into his life.

Starfire on the other hand wore her heart on her sleeve. He knew her powers depended on her emotions, although in a completely different way than Raven depended on hers. Starfire explained that Tamaranians were an extremely emotional race of people. She happily talked about her home world and Robin was always interested to listen. She viewed Earth and all it contained with bright eyes and a thirst to understand everything around her.

He found himself drawn to her openness and eagerness, like a moth to that flaming red hair. Her smiles made his knees weak and his stomach flutter. On his better days he might admit he entertained a sort of crush on her.

Thinking about her made him want to see her, right now. He hefted himself off the couch, leaving a swearing and sweating Cyborg in his wake.

He knocked on the door to her room but she wasn't there. He briefly contemplated seeing if she was holed up with Raven, but decided probably not. Raven could only tolerate Starfire for so long. He hoped that would change, it seemed like Starfire needed a girl friend sometimes, especially when her questions bordered on feminine issues. Usually those kinds of questions made him blush.

After a quick search, he realized she wasn't inside the tower. He made his way up to the roof. When he opened the door he had to shield his eyes from the beating sun, groaning as the heat blasted him in the face and clogged his lungs. It felt like he was walking into an oven.

After his eyes adjusted, he glanced out across the rooftop. His heart leaped into his throat.

He had never seen so much… _skin_.

Starfire was lying on a chaise lounge, a beach towel spread out across it and a bottle of tanning oil on the ground.

He gulped. She was lying on her stomach. There was a little scrap of a bikini covering her perfect round rump, and the strings from her top dangled off the sides of the chair. Apparently she didn't want a tan line.

Later he would mark this moment as the first time he had thoughts about his best friend that were anything but platonic.

"Robin!" she called. "Greetings!" She waved and started to lift up from the chair.

"Oh God," he blurted, covering his eyes with his hand, although there was a part of him that wished he hadn't.

Starfire giggled and looked down. "Oops. I forgot I had untied my top."

"Yeeeah," he said weakly, walking over with his hand still over his eyes. "Is it safe?"

"Yes," she said, reaching around and retying the strings.

He took his hand away. "How can you stand it out here? It's hotter than hell," he complained, wiping away the waterfall of perspiration from his forehead and neck.

He blushed when he realized her eyes were on his chest. She smiled and looked away.

"I do not understand. It is a glorious day."

He looked at her like she was crazy. "You like it this hot?"

"Oh, it reminds me of home," she said, turning onto her back. Robin followed her curves with his eyes and forgot to feel bad about it. "Tamaran is a very hot and arid planet. This is considered a pleasant temperature."

Robin fanned himself but the air was too thick and humid for it to help.

"Wow. Well no wonder you're enjoying yourself then."

"Yes. I love to do the basking in the sunlight." Her eyes lit up. "Could you do me the favor?"

"Oh?" he asked.

She picked up the bottle of oil.

"I cannot reach behind me," she said, looking completely innocent but he swore there was a sparkle in her eyes. She turned around on the chair, presenting her back to him and curving herself in an altogether way too pleasing manner.

His stomach dropped into a sea of fluttering butterflies and his eyes widened, and suddenly it wasn't because of the oppressive heat that he was sweating.

* * *

Hello! More for all of you. Thank you for your lovely suggestions Vylette Satine, and Star of Airdrie we're working on yours. Kry has a dirty mind; can you believe the crap she had Cyborg spouting in Bacon? I mean jeesh! (Kry just said: "Oh sure, blame me!" –I do Kry, absolutely. Even though the whole drabble revolved around my idea of "you have to warm up the frying pan before tossing in the bacon." Giggle.)

Thank you to everyone who's sticking around, and I'll try my best to post a little faster next time, scout's honor (holds up three fingers).

By the way, always always remember when tanning, if you untie your bikini top do not accidentally flash people. Kater doesn't know this from first hand experience. -cough-

Until next time!


	6. Barry

**Barry. –Suggested by Vylette Satine**

"He's _what_?"

Larry looked sheepish and tapped his non-magic fingers together. "I just wanted an arch nemesis too," he explained. "R'dnairok was so excited for me."

"You _created_ yourself an arch nemesis?" Robin blurted, disbelieving. "To impress _Starfire_?"

"My Erifrats, not yours," Larry protested. "There's nothing wrong with that! Only Erifrats… she liked Emannosrepcirerneg so much they ran off together."

Robin's eye twitched. "Who?"

"Emannosrepcirerneg," Larry explained with the patience of a saint as he hovered in mid air just before Robin's eyes.

Robin rubbed his face. "Okay. Let me get this straight. You used your magic finger to create… Barry… who is your equivalent to my Red X, Xder, and Erifrats… ran off with him?"

Larry nodded. "Will you help me get my Rats back?" he pleaded, his hands clasped together.

Robin pulled a face. "Okay, your names just sound odd."

Larry continued, "She's so impressed with his magic. Robin you have to teach me how to be manly and tough like you and flirt and make Erifrats all tingly like you make Starfire and if I impress Erifrats, then she'll come back to me!"

"I don't know that I can really help," Robin said. "I don't do magic."

"But we're boyfriend buddies!" Larry exclaimed. "And every Nosyarg kcid needs R'dnairok!" He battered his eyes at Robin. "Please?"

Robin really didn't want to continue this conversation. Starfire was already having hysterics about the conversation as a whole and had fallen off the bed. It was bad enough that Larry was so distraught he'd popped out of Robin's nose again in the middle of a heated make out session but really, enough was enough.

"Larry… um… Barry's got nothing on you. It's not the size of the… magic finger… that counts. It's how you use it."

* * *

**Sub. –Suggested by Star of Airdrie**

"Salami?" Cyborg called.

Beast Boy wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Ugg… but check. You have a veggie one for me, right?"

"Keeping your vegan crap separate," Cyborg complained with a roll of his eye. "But yes. Gotcha covered. Lettuce?"

"Check." The lettuce arched through the air from the fridge to be deftly caught by Cyborg after Beast Boy had thrown it over his shoulder.

"Better chuck me whatever tofu gunk you want on yours. Tomato?"

Across went the bag of tomatoes. "Check," Beast Boy said and calmly threw his tofu over his shoulder as well. "And here's my 'gunk'."

"At least you admit it."

Raven let out a heartfelt sigh from across the room. "Is my chicken one ready yet? I'm hungry."

Beast Boy scowled at her. "Keep your cape on Raven, this is a fine art."

She lifted an eyebrow. "All you're doing is tossing ingredients from the fridge to Cyborg. He's the one making them."

"Tossing is a fine art!"

"You got that right," Raven smirked.

Beast Boy was outraged. "Hey!"

"Calm down, you two," Cyborg said, wagging his knife at both of them. "Cheese."

"Check." A block of cheese flew through the air and clonked Cyborg on the head before he caught the fumble.

"Onions or no, Rae?" Cyborg asked.

"No thanks," she muttered, burying her face in her book again.

"Mushrooms?"

"… Yes please."

"Mushrooms, BB!"

Across went a paper bag of mushrooms. "Check."

"Pickles."

Beast Boy wrinkled his nose. "Yuk. And no. Starfire ate the last of our pickles."

There was a flurry of activity from Cyborg followed by a long moment of awed pause.

"We're finished."

Beast Boy nodded approvingly. "It's a thing of beauty."

"It's a sandwich," Raven muttered. "You eat it."

Cyborg gestured at his creations, stars in his eyes. "Yes, but look at those layers. The poise. The vegetable to meat ratio." Already he could taste the flavor.

"Vegetable to tofu ratio," Beast Boy said, taking his sandwich and having a bite.

"Oh whatever," Raven said with a roll of her eyes. "Can I have mine now?"

As though summoned by the sandwich gods, Robin appeared. "Ohh, hey. Subs! I was starving," he said as he grabbed the closest one off Cyborg's plate.

Cyborg batted at Robin's hands. "Robin, get yo' hands off that, it's mine."

Robin jumped up to sit on the bench itself, cheekily taking a bite of the sub before Cyborg could stop him. "Yum, Cy, this is really tasty. You've outdone yourself."

"He's right," Raven added, carefully chewing her bite. "Nice."

Beast Boy agreed with a nod, already stuffing his face.

"Subs?" Starfire asked, having been similarly summoned by the 'let's mess with the boy wonder' god, who was having a slow day, her hands behind her back as she regarded them curiously.

"Submarines, Star," Robin explained, swallowing his mouthful. "Do you want bite of mine?"

She tilted her head and innocently asked, "Is a Submarine not something filled with Seamen?"

* * *

**Couch.**

Raven was sitting on the couch reading, the sun shining in the bay windows, dust glittering in the bright afternoon rays. Beast Boy flopped down next to her and grinned.

She looked at him out the corner of her eyes, not turning her head.

"Yes?"

"Just wanna see what you're up to."

"You can't tell?"

"Well reading, duh Captain Obvious. For how long?"

Raven shrugged, turning back to her book. "Until you go away, probably."

Beast Boy ignored her comment, tilting his head and studying Raven's hair.

"What is that?" He reached forward. Raven pulled away.

"What are you doing?"

"There's something in your hair." Raven frowned and allowed Beast Boy to pull a tiny little gemstone out of her strands.

"Weird… it's this little crystal."

Raven leaned forward and looked mystified, wondering how that had gotten in her hair.

"Accessorizing, huh Raven?" Beast Boy teased. Something glinted on the couch. "Hey, there's another one."

The two of them stood up, and they appeared to be all over the couch.

"What the hell are these?"

The other three Titans looked over from the kitchen.

"What'd you get on my couch, BB?" Cyborg said threateningly, lumbering over.

"Nothing! It wasn't me! There's these weird crystally things all over it!"

Starfire's eyes widened. Robin coughed and looked away.

Cyborg studied the little gems stuck to Beast Boy's fingers. Recognition flooded onto his face.

"AWWWWHHH HELL NO!" He swung around and pointed an accusing finger at the two still sitting at the counter.

Both looked extremely guilty.

"You didn't! You DID! She got them vajizzle things or whatever… AW MAN! What the hell were you two _doin'_ on my couch?"

"Apparently each other," Raven said, pulling another one out of her hair with a little distaste. "At least, obviously there was much inappropriate fondling."

"I don't get it, they're just little crystals. So Star put them on her arm or whatever," Beast Boy said, examining them.

"Oh no, BB," Cyborg said. "Her arm ain't where she put vajazzles."

The expression melted off Beast Boy's face.

"EWWW! She put them _where_?" he exclaimed shrilly, trying desperately to shake them off his fingers.

* * *

**Cold. –Suggested by Vylette Satine**

A piercing scream rang throughout the tower.

Robin's heart was in his throat and he was immediately heading for the common room, Beast Boy converging in the hallway with him. He looked worried too. That was Starfire's scream.

Robin heard his name being called frantically.

When the two boys burst into the room, Raven and Cyborg having caught up too, Starfire was huddled on the couch and shaking like a leaf. Her eyes were widened in terror and she was staring outside the huge bay window like the world was ending out there.

Robin skidded to a stop behind the couch.

"What's wrong?" he exclaimed. His eyes scanned the entire room looking for any sign of threat or anything even misplaced to cause her reaction.

"What has happened!" Starfire cried, pointing a shaking finger to the window.

"What?" Robin said, confused. He looked outside. There didn't seem to be anything out of the ordinary. Sure, Jump City was experiencing a particularly vicious cold snap, the churning ocean was a slate gray, the clouds formed an oppressive sheet across the sky, and a fresh blanket of snow covered everything-

Oh. The snow.

"Starfire, you've never seen snow before, have you?" Robin asked.

"What is this snow?" she trembled. "I have never seen anything like this. I thought…" she trailed off with a blush.

Robin couldn't help it, he laughed. Cyborg and Beast Boy grinned, and Raven shook her head with a smirk.

"It's basically frozen rain," Robin explained.

"Frozen rain," Starfire repeated, mulling over the concept.

"Yes. When the air temperature drops below a certain degrees, water freezes and falls, accumulating on the ground. We call it snow."

"Oh. So we are not under attack? The sky is not falling?"

He grinned. "Not at all. Actually, want to go outside? It's really fun to play in."

"You can _touch_ it?" she said, shrinking away from the window and curling her hands to her chest.

"It's a little chilly, but yes you can touch it. You can eat it too, if you want," he said humorously.

"Just don't eat any yellow snow," Cyborg advised with sassy smirk.

"Eww," Raven said.

"Sometimes I can't hold it guys, I'm sorry!" Beast Boy whined.

"There is yellow snow?" Starfire asked.

"Ah…" Robin said. He glared at Cyborg and smacked him.

"There is when Beast Boy turns into a dog and uses the yard as his bathroom," Raven drawled.

"Oh!" Starfire crinkled her nose in distaste and also gave Beast Boy a look. "I shall make absolutely sure I stay away from the snow that is yellow."

The changeling looked sheepish. "Well! When _Robin_ uses the bathroom for like an hour putting in his stupid hair gel what am I supposed to do?"

"Oh shut up," Robin rolled his eyes.

"Seriously dude, you take longer than the girls to get ready."

"Come on Star, I'll take you outside," Robin said, glowering at Beast Boy and grabbing Starfire's hand. She blushed at his contact as he pulled her up from the couch.

"At least B uses the yard and not the house plant, like he did that one time," Cyborg quipped. "He totally killed the poor thing."

"Nuh uh! It's because no one watered it ever! I was doing it a favor! My ah… _contribution_ was the only drop of liquid that ficus ever saw!"

"I am not certain I wish to experience this snow," Starfire said hesitantly, Beast Boy and Cyborg's banter fading as Robin led them out of the common room.

"I'll be right with you," he assured her. She inclined her head shyly. She was embarrassed about making a scene over something that was apparently nothing. There were just too many strange and new things about this planet.

"Let's see…" Robin said, digging in the coat closet. "I know I have a winter jacket in here somewhere…"

"Oh, you have to put on extra clothes?"

Robin stopped rummaging and looked at her. "You don't?"

She shrugged. "I can fly through space. It is extremely cold in the void. My people have the ability to accommodate to the temperatures around us."

"Oh. Okay, no coat for you then. I still need one though, cause I'm warm blooded," he joked, pulling out his winter coat. He also found his winter boots and tugged them on, slipping a pair of mittens on his hands.

"Ready?"

He led her down to the ground floor of the tower and held her hand as he guided her out the door.

She was apprehensive as Robin stepped into the snow. He grabbed her hand, waiting for her to step out too. She toed it with her boot, consciously trying to curb the strength of her nervous grip on his.

He smiled. "It's okay, Star."

She stepped out, her foot crunching down in the snow. She took another step, staring wondrously at the white fluff covering the entire island.

"Here, I'll show you how to make a snow angel!" Robin said, releasing her hand and dashing out into the yard. She let his hand go with slight disappointment.

He flopped backward and began flapping his arms and legs, pushing up drifts of snow around him. Starfire giggled, because he looked a little more than silly.

Finally he got up, brushing the snow off his coat and out of his hair.

"Come here," he beckoned.

Starfire floated up into the air.

"That's cheating Starfire," he teased. "You have to walk in it!"

She huffed and landed next to him.

"Brrr, you make me cold just looking at you," Robin said, noting her exotic orange skin didn't even have one goose bump.

"I do not feel the cold like you do," she said, tilting her head at the impression he had made on the ground.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, clapping her hands merrily. "It rather does look like the mythical winged humanoids!"

He chuckled. "You try making one."

She complied, bravely laying down in the snow and copying the motions she had seen him do.

She floated up, shaking the snow out of her air.

"There. They are a pair," she smiled at him, heat rising in her belly at his blush.

"Perfect," he agreed.

At that moment a wayward snowball flew through the air and smacked Starfire right on the bottom.

The poor alien princess yelped and flung herself into Robin's arms, exclaiming about how she _knew_ this snow was not benevolent and now it had attacked them and she should not have allowed her guard down.

Robin was surprised at his friend plastering herself against him, but the guy in him couldn't help but think it was a shame he had this huge downy jacket on, because he wondered what her body would feel like against his.

His musings were cut short when he heard a familiar mischievous giggle from behind a snowdrift. He rolled his eyes with a grin and patted Starfire on the back to calm her down, though she was still clinging to him.

"Beast Boy!" He called the changeling out.

Said changeling popped his head up from behind his cover. "Sorry, I just couldn't resist!"

"Don't scare Starfire! She was unsure about the snow the way it was!"

"I know dude, but ah… don't you think you should be thanking me?" Beast Boy waggled his eyebrows.

Starfire eeped and pulled away, blushing madly. Robin coughed and tugged at his collar.

"You're totally welcome, bro."

* * *

**Realism.**

"Robin, I do not bend that way."

"Um… how's this?"

"You are on my hair."

"Sorry. Can you move your foot?"

"How is this?"

"Better. Are you comfortable?"

"Yes."

"Can I move yet?"

"Are you certain you are positioned correctly?"

"Um, pretty sure… I mean, it's not hurting is it?"

"No. It is very… nice?"

"Nice? Oh, now I'm hurt."

"Ow, not too hard please."

"Damn it, they make it look so easy in the movies. Sorry. What if I did…?"

"Oh… yes… that is nice."

"At least I can do something right."

"I did not expect this to be quite so… awkward."

"Me either- Ow, ow, ow! Starfire! Human! Break easy!"

"Oh! Robin, are you injured?"

"Just my pride."

_-donk-_

"Ow!"

"You broke my headboard!"

"You slammed me into it!"

"Are you okay?"

"Yes. Shall we move down the bed a bit?"

"Okay. Let me just- um… yeah… better?"

"Much."

"Except I fell out. Hang on."

"That tickles."

"Haha, sorry. Just… I don't think I put the condom on right; it's kind of hurting. Sec, I'll fix it."

"Okay."

"Nope, that's not gonna work. It's all twisted funny. New condom time. Sorry about this."

"Better to be safe, Robin."

"You're really sexy when you're all flushed like that."

"I like you with the messy hair."

"I'm glad. Okay, ready again."

"Just be gentle."

"How's that?"

"Are you in?"

"I'm a little concerned that you have to ask."

"Oh, my apologies, I did not mean to imply—"

"It's okay, I guess there's a lot happening down there for you."

"Yes."

"Doesn't hurt anymore, does it?"

"No, it is quite pleasant."

"Good."

…

"Why are you laughing?"

"Oh! I am so- _teehee_… sorry, it is just… listen… no, do not stop."

"… Okay, that's so romantic right there, Star. Way to ruin the mood."

"It sounds like Beast Boy slurping a—"

"Beast Boy is not a topic I want to talk about when we're doing this!"

"If you kissed me, perhaps I would not… _mmmphfm_."

…

"Can you go a little faster?"

"_Sssssck_… Grayson Rocket preparing to launch."

-_thwack_-

"Hey!"

"It was _not_ funny."

"I thought it was."

…

"Oh… yes."

…

"I think I'm getting the hang of this."

…

"Can you do that again?"

"What? This?"

"Oh. _Yes_…"

…

"Oh, I do like that."

"Star, you feel so good."

…

"Are you close?"

"I… ah… do not know. It feels very good."

"I don't know… if… I… too close… can't hold back… longer."

"That is the okay, Robin."

"_Oh_ …

…that was _amazing_."

"I found it quite enjoyable. You make the cutest noises."

"Haha, thanks. Sorry about… you know, not getting you there too."

"I do not mind. We may try again later."

"Okay. Hang on, I just gotta get rid of this…yeah. Um, _ick_."

"You are coming back to snuggle me, are you not?"

"Yes, of course."

"Good. Er… Robin, did you remember to lock the door?"

"Um no, why? SILKIE! Get off the bed!"

* * *

Okay, first off you should know that my Scout's honor means absolutely nothing because I was not a boy scout (and even if I was a girl scout, we're just gonna skip over that fact. I have no honor whatsoever, apparently). The reason why this post took so long was because Kry was dragging her feet on her couple of drabbles, having been busy with Masks, and it was mostly late because she wrote Realism after her whole public service announcement on Masks, and Kry borrowed something from One Thing for the ending of Realism. So I couldn't post this until I posted on One Thing, otherwise it just would've looked funny. And we all know my track record with One Thing, which was taking me forever.

Anyway, there's our realistic sex scene. Haha it is totally not hot at all! Sex is sooo awkward until you get the hang of it.

Thank you for the lovely suggestions everyone, please keep them coming!


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